12.06.2013
Hello,
You know, babe, i got a thought today. I was thinking how much you had to love Marina if you went to meet her parents in three month? I wonder how serious you took her to do that. Interesting how you saw your future with her. And Nina as you say is so wonderful..
I am curious how now you see us.
Also masturbating today and watching porn… looking at those girls i realized that i am not sexy. At any level. I don't meen visualy. Of course i know that i look bettert than many girls, i have bettert body and such. But i mean… My gesture, the way i hold myself and my behavior — that isn't sexy. You even told me once that i have no idea how to play with a man, and that i need to learn how to BE sexy. I don't feel confident. Few things don't let me to. Such as heairy ass, pussy and stomach, especially stomach, on the second place my butt.
I don't know if these things come with time or you learn them. I am a girl, and you need a woman. I think i have already used this phrase somewhere once. Funny.
I am afraid that things are not gonna be better after you come back. I mean i love you, but i think you will be disapointed. And if i lose because of this that's gonna be a brogue kick right into my heart.
While you are somewhere there i know that you are kind of mine, you belong to me stiil. I am your, and i don't wanna lose it in september.